Roy C. what's your thesis?

Ohai.

I've drank three Monsters, I have the shakes, and I feel like shit. Let's write a blog, shall we? Sounds like perfect writing conditions. So how are all of you people doing this evening? Hopefully better than me...Haha. I'm pretty much on the border of illegal insanity right now. Just sayin.

So anything new with you? No? Nothing? Wow...You lead a more boring life than me. I had an awesome experience today. And by awesome, I mean I wanted to punch a fucker in the face experience. I've been trying to change the way I act around people so that I come off as less socially awkward right off the bat. I'm not that hard to get to know really, it just takes me longer than I would like to come out of my shell to most people. Apperantly, though, I really am failing at this. I had a newer friend of mine today legit ask me if I was gay. Now, don't get me wrong. I have nothing against the gay community by any means. You choose how to live your life, just don't do that shit around me. But when I, once again, got asked this and really meant it, I got pissed. Well, maybe pissed is the wrong word, but I was legit offended by them asking this. I don't think that I come off that way to people, but I guess I was wrong as far as that goes. It looks like I'm going to have to try to re-image myself once again. Seriously, maybe this is why I always end up in the best friend zone. Not a bad place to be, don't get me wrong. It just sucks. Sucks so hardcore. I want to move past that, or find someone who will love me like she used to. Haha. Yeah right. What a load of horse shit. I am who I am, and I'm pretty sure that no one finds that attractive. I mean hell, half of the people I know seem to think that I'M GAY. Fuck me sideways. Just sayin...

First semester of school is almost done, and I have the list of majors that I'm considering limited down to a select few. The only that is left to do is set up meeting with academic advisers and decide on which major would be good for me. One of them will pay good even if I were to choose to stay in Indy, while the other pays more if I move out of state. Both sound fairly appealing, and the pay for both of them isn't too shabby either coming out of college. My number one concern is if I'm going to be happy doing what I do. Oh, and if I'll be able to understand the work that I'm doing.

Does it sound like I'm ADD tonight? Well, you can thank the Monster for that. Or, I guess Monsters...Second one is almost down. First one came back up. YAY! MOVING ON!!!

I've been thinking about things a lot lately. I gotta say, I'm starting to think about the past way more than I should. I have a certain few people to thank for that, though. Trying to tell me how I should have done things and how things would be different if I made smarter choices. Who are you people to judge my past? I've been getting pissy at people a lot this week, and I'm sorry if you are one of them. But jezz....My "best friend" was reminding me of everything and telling me how he liked the old me. Really? Really? You liked the me who wanted to kill himself every fucking day? No, he was referring to the me back in February. Yeah, I like that me too. But here's the deal. That me isn't coming back. Not for a while, at any rate. I wish it could, believe me. I wish I was that happy again. But with the stress of school on my back right now, it's not happening for a while. So pardon me if I have to fake a smile and a wave to keep everyone else happy, but that's how things are going to have to be done.

Wow. After reading each thing, I kinda question if I'm going to even leave this up anymore.

I'm tired of my friends lying to me as well. I try to be there for my friends whenever I can be, though I don't martyr myself as much as I used to over things. But I hate hate hate hate hate HATE when my friends lie to me. Seriously. Only thing that pisses me off. Other than stupid people, but we'll get to that in a second.

Actually, let's get to that now. I really don't feel like talking about that anymore. I had a handful of religious talks this week, and OH BOY do I love those. I watched a video about an abortion clinic and people protesting in front of it, along with a few other topics. These kind of talks really get me fired up, but also gets me thinking about life in general. Fun stuff, let me tell you. I don't believe in any sort of religion at this point in my life, though I hope to one day, to be honest. It just sickens me to see how people behave when put in these situations. I mean really, saying it was your daughters fault because she got raped and then calling her a slut? What the hell is wrong with people like this? I mean, I know they are one in a dozen, but the fact that they still exist makes me question religion as a whole.

Sooooooooooo yeah. I realize this blog is way different than my normal, and I'm pretty sure that none of it makes sense to anyone but me. But I'm going to post this anyways. These are literally my uncensored thoughts. Take them as you will. But don't twist them. Otherwise, we're all fucked.

Just sayin.
Roy C. what's your thesis?
Obai.
I DON'T FUCKING BELIEVE IT!